Search

Couple: where does infidelity start?

When a couple goes through the tsunami of an extramarital affair, the question arises "How did our couple get to this point?" Every story is different, but what are the warning signs to keep in mind to try to protect your relationship? No one is immune to the temptations of the flesh, but everyone is invited to fight to protect this commitment to fidelity.


Long before the sexual act, the enemy can slip the poison of infidelity in an insidious, discreet, almost excusable way. A gesture that is a little more forceful, a look that speaks volumes, an event that one prefers not to share with his or her spouse, these are the first steps that put distance between the two spouses. The temptation arises, will the door to infidelity open further, quietly, little by little, or will it be closed with courage, even heroism?


The first aspect of infidelity is the other. The other outside the couple. This other man who discreetly brushes the wife's arm, this other woman who uses her charm to draw the husband's attention to her, a coffee shared but which will be evaded by the spouses in the evening account of their day.


Why is this not said? Why this little secret? What is there in this relationship with another that the spouses cannot tell each other? These are the warning signs of infidelity. Another person has entered the couple and is beginning to strain the marital bonds. Beware. Rather than playing with fire, tasting the spice of the first emotions, isn't it better to put some distance between you and your partner until you can see clearly your soul and your intentions?


The second facet of infidelity is therefore a message about oneself. Not all the fault is to be blamed on this third party. What do these first signs of infidelity mean? Need for attention or recognition? Need for tenderness? Lassitude in the couple? The weight of children that make you want to rediscover the sweetness of being a woman or a man before being a parent? What is there to look for outside the couple? What hopes or expectations does the other bring? What barriers have been created within the marriage to deliberately want to put one's spouse at a distance or to simply let this other come a little too close?


Infidelity begins to nest in very small details. The key is to dare to let the light in to illuminate personal flaws and fill in the gaps in the relationship before you face a gaping hole that could sink the ship.


Men and women are created in the image of God. And the Lord is faithful in all things. It is also up to each one to take the necessary weapons to resist the weakness of the flesh, both in obvious situations of seduction and in the small discreet details of daily life, in order to be faithful in all things and to find the fullness of God.